Miss vs. Ms. vs. Mrs.: Differences and How to Use Them

Mrs. is the title given to women that are or were at one time married. Pronounced “mis-iz.”

Miss is the title given to unmarried and young women. Pronounced “mis.”

Ms. is used when you are unsure of a woman’s marital status. It can also be used for a single woman or a woman who was married but either divorced or separated. Pronounced “mizz.”

Mx. is a gender-neutral title given to those who choose not to identify with a gender. Pronounced “mix.”

Let’s start with the easy one: Mrs. “Mrs.” is the proper title for a married woman whether she has taken her spouse’s last name or not. This was not always the case–you used to only use Mrs. if you were taking your husband’s first and last name– but times have changed! If you know the woman is married and you want to use a title or they use the title, “Mrs.” is the way to go.

Then there is Miss. You can comfortably refer to an unmarried woman as “Miss,” from little girls to adult women (engaged or not). At a certain age, “Miss” can start to feel a little too young, and that’s where the difference between Miss and Ms. comes in.

“Ms.” doesn’t indicate marital status. It’s more of a personal preference which makes it both a safe bet and a bit vague. Though some people think "Ms." is a shortening of the word "mistress," it is actually a made-up title (that dates all the way back to 1901) to address an adult woman without commenting on her marital status.

These days, some women prefer to use “Ms.” when they don’t want to disclose their marital status, such as female teachers with their students. It’s also appropriate to use with unmarried women of a certain age. The age at which you make the transition from “Miss” to “Ms.” is not clearly defined, much to the woes of engaged couples and calligraphers everywhere.

We say it’s best to go on a case-by-case basis. If you have a fun-loving, youthful, unmarried aunt who’s 38, she may not love being designated as a “Ms.” vs a “Miss”. “That’s how people refer to my mother!” you can imagine your aunt saying. However, a more conservative woman only a few years older may find “Miss” to be ill-suited and even immature.

When addressing a wedding guest who is gender-neutral, use the title "Mx." However, know that "Mx." is a universal title that can be used by anyone. Even if someone identifies with a specific gender, you may still use "Mx.,” specially in situations where the sender is unaware of the recipient's preferred title.

Let’s say your aunt who was married for the past twenty years just got divorced last year. It would be acceptable to use Mrs. or Ms. here. However, it’s a matter of personal preference so if you are not sure which one your aunt prefers, go with Ms.

It’s easy to tell these two apart: Miss is for a young, single woman while Mrs. is for a woman that is or was married (regardless of age).

If a guest is gender-neutral it is best to go with Mx.

If a guest is separated but not divorced, then she is likely still using her married last name. If this is the case, then you can either use "Mrs." or "Ms." to address the guest and use her first name. As always, though, it is best to find out what she prefers to go by.

• Mrs. Alejandra Ramirez
• Ms. Alejandra Ramirez

After a divorce, if a woman keeps her married name, you can either use "Mrs." or "Ms." to address the guest followed by her first name and married name. If she is using her maiden name, then use "Ms." along with her first name and maiden name. Again, it's always best to find out what she prefers to go by if you can.

• Mrs. Allison Chan
• Ms. Allison Chan
• Ms. Allison Lee (maiden name)

Traditionally, a widow retains her husband's name until she remarries. When addressing an invitation to her, you can use her husband's full name ("Mrs. John Stanley") for formal situations, or her own first name and married last name (Mrs. Elizabeth Stanley). In this instance, given the sensitive nature of the situation, it is best to ask before putting it in writing.

• Mrs. John Stanley (formal)
• Mrs. Elizabeth Stanley

If you’re mailing a wedding invitation to a guest who is a judge, use the title “The Honorable” and list him or her first, followed by the name of their partner if they have one.

• The Honorable Sonya Patel and Mr. Niven Patel

If a guest is a doctor, it is appropriate to address the envelope using the title "Doctor" fully spelled out. This applies to any guest who has received a doctoral degree–including medical doctors, vets, and dentists–and guests who have earned a Ph.D. or any other academic, non-medical doctoral degree.

• Husband is a doctor, wife is not: Doctor Michael and Mrs. Sabrina Lee
• Wife is a doctor, husband is not (her name should be listed first): Doctor Sharon and Mr. Erik Sheffield
• Both partners are doctors: The Doctors Alfonso or Drs. Sonia and Carlos Alfonso

For guests with military titles, spell out the titles in full. If both guests have military titles, then list the guest with the higher rank first. When addressing the wedding invitation envelope, indent the second line if both titles don't fit on one line.

• Captain Sarah Chao and Mr. Jason Chao
• Colonels Joanna and Marcus Gallary

If you are inviting a guest who is an attorney, you do not need to use "Esquire" or "Esq." when addressing their wedding invitation. Use "Mr." or "Ms." or "Mrs." without the professional designation.

• Mr. Noah Kennel
• Ms. Megan Audap
• Mrs. Patricia Cameron

When addressing your wedding invites, you'll want to be sure to use the correct titles for your guests on the envelopes. Besides the Mr. and Miss vs. Ms. vs. Mrs. vs. Mx. differences described above, there are some additional special titles that you will need to use correctly.

It depends on your preference. Typically, brides who change their last name after the wedding go by "Mrs." since it indicates they share the same last name as their husband (i.e. "Mr. and Mrs. Wong").

You can also go by "Ms." if you'd prefer your title not to be associated with your marital status. If you're keeping your maiden name, you have options: You can go by "Ms." or even use "Mrs."

Ms. does not necessarily mean someone is divorced, although it is an appropriate title for someone who is divorced. Ms. can also be used for a married woman who chooses not to disclose her marital status or an older single woman.

It is okay to use Ms. instead of Mrs. if you’re unsure of a woman’s marital status or her age. However, in certain situations it wouldn’t be appropriate to use Ms. instead of Mrs., such as if a woman is a widow that is keeping the Mrs. title. That’s why it’s important to find out as much information as you can before committing to a title.

One title is not better than the other. In general, you can’t go wrong with Ms. when in doubt. However, if you are confident that a woman is married with a changed last name, Mrs. is the right choice.

When each member of the couple uses a different last name, use "Ms." as their titles and list each name in alphabetical order by last name, as in "Ms. Kristin Hampton and Ms. Sarah Lee." However, if you know the couple prefers "Mrs.," then certainly use that title instead.

If both partners in the same-sex couple use the same last name, use "Ms." as their titles and list each name in alphabetical order by first name, as in "Ms. Christine Azoveda and Ms. Stacey Azoveda." Again, if you know the couple prefers "Mrs.," then use that title instead.

Traditionally, a woman’s name preceded a man’s on an envelope address, and his first and surname were not separated (Jane and John Kelly). Nowadays, the order of the names—whether his name or hers comes first—does not matter and either way is acceptable.

Miss, Mrs., Ms., and Mx. are referred to as titles, prefixes, and honorifics.

For more examples and guidance on correctly addressing your envelopes, visit our guide to Address Your Wedding Invitations.

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• Invitation wording etiquette
• How to assemble wedding invitation envelopes
• Most popular wedding etiquette questions answered!